British Royal Family Condemns Media’s Ugly Attacks on Their Traditional Practice of Sexual Abuse

Prince Andrew and Queen Elizabeth II (Image source: The Onion). Click image to enlarge.

LONDON—Defending the allegations of sexual assault against Prince Andrew as integral to their rich and storied culture, the British royal family issued a statement Tuesday condemning the media’s ugly attacks on their traditional practice of sexual abuse. “This is one of our most dearly held traditional practices, which can be traced through our family tree for thousands of years,” said Queen Elizabeth II, who noted that if not for their long-standing tolerance of mass sexual perversion, the royal family’s lineage would have broken a long time ago. “Sexual misconduct is a cornerstone of the British monarchy. A complete disregard for consent courses through our regal veins and defines what it means to be a British royal. We invite the media to think twice before interfering in our time-honored history of abusing women and children.” The queen added that Prince Andrew would continue to perform these ancient royal duties in private during this difficult time.

Source: The Onion

Related: The BBC Newsnight Interview with Prince Andrew |
Exposing Jeffrey Epstein’s International Sex Trafficking Ring

This entry was posted in Culture & Society, Humour & Satire and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.